sin is in

I don't get what the big deal about "sinners" is. Some churchy lady started into me about being a sinner the other day. I was just minding my own, drinking out of a paper bag at the waterfront, waiting for the latest shipment of uhhh vegetables to come in and this woman comes up and starts calling me a sinner.

Call me crazy, but sippin' booze out of a paper bag seems like a lot more fun than going around passing judgement on people. I like to "sin" as it's commonly known. I like to drive too fast, drink too much, eat too richly and ingest any and everything that will get me off.

What's the point of life if you're not getting a charge out of it?

I'm well aware that I'm going to die sooner than most people. I'm aware that I'm a walking toxic waste dump and I just don't care. So I don't get the squares constant need to tell me about it. I really want to get a t-shirt made that says something like "I am aware that I am drinking/smoking/snorting/fucking myself into an early grave, thanks"

But everyone knows people who wear t-shirts with funny sayings on them are douchebags and not cool. And everyone knows if I had a shirt with words on it, one of the words wouldn't be "thanks."

Anyway back to the judgement. You don't see me running into a church or a school telling people get their buts back on the barstool. Hell the more of you squares there are, the more room there is at the bar for me. And it's quieter without all you fools mucking up the place.